Friday, November 14, 2008

1. How do you catch a unique rabbit? Unique up on it.

2. How do you catch a tame rabbit? Tame way.

3. How do crazy people go through the forest? They take the psycho path.

4. How do you get Holy Water? You boil the hell out of it.

5. What do fish say when they hit a concrete wall? Dam!

6. What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long? Polaroid's.

7. What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? A stick.

8. What to you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese.

9. What do you call Santa's helpers? Subordinate Clauses.

10. What do you call four bullfighters in quicksand? Quattro Sinko.

11. What do you get from a pampered cow?Spoiled milk.

12. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? Frostbite.

13. What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches? A nervous wreck.

14. What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Anyone can roast beef.

15. Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

16. Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Because they have big fingers .

17. Why don't blind people like to skydive? Because it scares the dog.

18. What kind of coffee was served on the Titanic? Sanka.

19. What is the difference between a Harley and a Hoover? The location of the dirt bag. {{Apologies to my husband! :-)}}

20. Why did Pilgrims' pants always fall down? Because they wore their belt buckle on their hat.

21. What's the difference between a bad golfer and a bad skydiver? A bad golfer goes, Whack. Dang! A bad skydiver goes, Dang! Whack .

22. How are a Texas tornado and a Tennessee divorce the same? Somebody's gonna lose a trailer

Now, admit it. At least one of these made you smile.

2 comments :

Marcia Gruver said...

Too funny! I smiled at most of them. Okay, not number 17. I didn't get that one. I think it dove right over my head.

Elizabeth Ludwig said...

LOLOLOL!! Marcia, it scares the seeing eye dog. LOL!

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