Friday Funnies

Martha Stewart vs. Maxine...Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of an ice cream cone to prevent ice cream drips. Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for Pete's sake! You are probably lying on the couch with your feet up eating it anyway! ...

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Industry News

The Christian Pulse Announces Summer Reading Contest...22 books, 22 reviews, 22 winners Atlanta, GA - May 1, 2009 – Looking for the latest Christian book release to take with you on summer vacation or for relaxing on those cool summer nights? Beginning June 1, 2009, TheChristianPulse.com will give away 22 Christian books in 22 days. Visit www.thechristianpulse.com daily...

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Tuesday Devotional

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Friday Funnies

How To Know Whether You Are Ready To Have Kids Or NotMESS TESTSmear peanut butter on the sofa and curtains. Place a fish stick behind the couch and leave it there all summer.TOY TESTObtain a 55-gallon box of Legos (or you may substitute roofing tacks). Have a friend spread them all over the house. Put on a blindfold. Try to walk to the bathroom or kitchen. Do not scream because this would wake a child at night.GROCERY STORE TESTBorrow one or two...

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Tuesday Devotional

Max’ism – Happy to see YouLuke 15:11-24Max can be counted on for one sure thing, he will always be happy to see me.Our family went home for Christmas this year. Since we decided to fly, I arranged for Max to stay with a sitter. Yes, people will actually babysit your pet.Anyway, we were gone for ten days. The lady who volunteered to keep Max was wonderful. She bought him toys,...

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Monday Mystery Theater

The Case:Donald Cartwright, an arrogant lawyer, is found dead in a store. The murder weapon, in plain sight, is never discovered.The Mystery:Who killed Donald, and how?The Clues:1. Cartwright’s body was sitting in a chair.2. Cartwright had been a prosecuting attorney.The Answer:Think you know the answer? Fill in the comment box to submit your guess. Winner receives a free...

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Friday Funnies

TOP 10 SIGNS YOUR SWIMMING POOL NEEDS CLEANING10) Neighborhood kids ask if they can jump on your trampoline.9) PH is so high, in vitro fertilization is possible.8) Skipping rocks across it causes sparks.7) New algae species attract a Discovery Channel film crew to your backyard.6) Jello-like water slowing the pace of water polo games to unacceptable levels.5) The Grim Reaper shows up in his Speedo.4) "DREDGE ME" spelled out in algae on the bottom.3)...

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Tuesday Devotional

Max’ism – What Are You Chasing?Deuteronomy 4:33-39Max is territorial. Living objects, with the exception of me, my husband, my kids, and occasionally the cat, are not allowed on his turf, and he is serious about his responsibilities. Which is why the appearance of a stray kitten in our yard one day, was seen as a personal challenge.I walked into the kitchen and found Max...

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Mystery Theater Answer...

We have a winner for today's mystery! Congratulations, Lisa. Here is the full story...On March 15, 44 BC, Julius Caesar was stabbed to death in the senate house by his friend and protégé, Marcus Junius Brutus, and several others. Despite Caesar’s heroism and reforms, his power as dictator for life caused great resentment among his enemies and even some of his friends. It was an early, and very famous case of political back-stabbin...

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Monday Mystery Theater

The Case:A controversial, ambitious senator is murdered in a public place.The Mystery:Who was the man? Who killed him and why?The Clues:1. The victim had been a war hero.2. It was a mid-month murder.The Answer:Think you know the answer? Fill in the comment box to submit your guess. Winner receives a free boo...

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Friday Funnies

Here are some simple guidelines for helping you determine where a driver comes from:1. One hand on wheel, one hand on horn: CHICAGO2. One hand on wheel, one finger out window: NEW YORK3. One hand on wheel, one finger out window, cutting across all lanes of traffic: NEW JERSEY4. One hand on wheel, one hand on newspaper, foot solidly on accelerator: BOSTON5. One hand on wheel, one hand on nonfat double decaf cappuccino, cradling cell phone, brick...

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Mystery Theater Answer...

No one correctly solved Monday's mystery! Here's the correct answer. Better luck next week, sleuths... The widowed Mrs. Steele had come to regard Monsieur Harold, her hairstylist and sometime escort, as the son she’d never had. In an unguarded moment on the dance floor at The Gator Club, she had told Harold that he was the sole heir to her $11 million fortune. Harold’s eyes lit up like a cash register, as he was an inveterate loser at the dog races....

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Industry News

BESTSELLING CHRISTIAN AUTHOR'S STORY IS SHOWCASED ON ABC'S 20/20 Testimony of A Father's Forgiveness to be Highlighted on National Television Friday, May 1 (THE WOODLANDS, TEXAS) The evening started off with the Whitaker family going to a restaurant for dinner. Nothing especially unusual about that. The home, one of many on the well-kept block in Sugarland,...

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Tuesday Devotional

Max’ism: Dogged DeterminationProverbs 4:18-27Dachshunds are bred hunters. Their shape and temperament makes them ideal for searching out small animals and rodents. In fact, when Max sets his mind to something, it’s nearly impossible to distract him.Take for example, our walks. Once Max has the leash on, he turns neither to the right nor to the left. He knows exactly which...

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Monday Mystery Theater

The Case:Mrs. Bentley Steele, an aging Palm Beach socialite, is found sitting in a chair, dead. Among the evidence incriminating her killer is a sign on the wall next to her.The Mystery:Who killed Mrs. Steele? How and why was she murdered?The Clues:1. Mrs. Steele was rich and had no relatives.2. Mrs. Steele was at the beauty salon.The Answer:Think you know the answer? Fill...

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Friday Funnies

MARTHA STEWART'S ETIQUETTE GUIDE FOR REDNECKS1. Never take a beer to a job interview.2. Always identify people in your yard before shooting at them.3. It's considered tacky to take a cooler to church.4. If you have to vacuum the bed it's time to change sheets.5. Even if you're CERTAIN that you are included in the will ...it is still considered tacky to drive a U-Haul to the funeral.DINING OUT1. When decanting wine, make sure that you tilt the paper...

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